Learning to be charismatic is simple and starts with the first step: focus on others more than you do yourself. From here, you can only succeed, and soon you’ll love yourself, and others will love you.
Listen more than you talk
Normally, it’s said that the loudest and the most ‘out there’ people are the most charismatic. But, if you ask anyone, they’ll say that those people can actually be rather annoying. Charisma is all about how you interact with people, and the people who listen can connect more than the people who just talk at people. Asking questions, maintaining eye contact, smiling, nodding and laughing are all responses you should non-verbally be giving your audience. This shows that they’re important to you and that you care about what they have to say. It’s also important to note that you should never talk too much unless asked your opinion because this normally turns the conversation around to you. Another note: put your phone AWAY. There’s nothing worse than talking to someone who is on their phone. Yes, this means you.
Don’t discuss other people’s’ downfalls
Talking negatively about other people is the biggest turn-off, and couldn’t be further away from being charismatic. Yes, we all love a bit of gossip nowadays, but if you’ve ever been on the outside of a conversation and heard someone dishing the dirt on another person – you normally think that person if a bit of a jerk. Don’t be that guy. And if you are going to be that guy, at least make it about last night’s episode of The Batchelor – rather than someone you all know.
You can never give enough praise
Praising others should never be something you have to think about doing. Acknowledging when people do well should be a natural reaction, and one you adopt into your daily routine. This will show people that you care about what they do, and will appreciate your praise, and they feel like they’re worthwhile.
Don’t be the guy who always talks about himself
One of the main aspects of being charismatic is being humble. Nobody likes the guy who always talks about how he won another $10 on the lottery last night (even though he probably didn’t because that’s the fourth time this month) because they’re the kind of person who receives a groan as they walk in the door. They don’t light the room up. Others aren’t impressed when you’re pretentious and self-important… unless they’re pretentious and self-important too.
Never give to receive
If you only do something nice to receive something equally nice back, you’re charismatic on occasion. Being able to give without thinking about what you’re going to receive establishes real connections and relationships. It turns out that most of the time people only want time and attention from you, so it’s really not that difficult.